New Year, new do, new me, new you

Happy 2009.

Boom!

What are your New Years Resolutions?

Mine is simple: Become better.

Better at what?

-A better friend

-A better daughter

-A better listener

-Better with patience

-Better with money

-Better with self preservation

-Better with follow up and GUMPTION

-Better at finding my inner voice & life calling

Perhaps, for me one of the biggest problems I have is that I am a dreamer. I dream myself into situations - & it's hard to realize- damn it! - You're 24, you want to live in New Zealand, California, NYC, Austin, try my hand at teaching English as a second language. For Heavens sake, I sure have a lot of plans . . . and perhaps my late night woe comes from this innate pressure I put on myself.

breathing. in & out. in & out.

I'm second guessing myself, and I feel anxious over this new chapter. I can't tell you why, I just ALWAYS imagined myself as being great someday.. and I know I will be, I'm just not sure why it's taking so long. I see all of my friends buckled down with careers, serious boyfriends and rent payments. I'm still trying to get my feet on the ground and settled into a career.

So I do not want to continue to whine, I want to let you know that life is beautiful. I have wonderful supporting people in my life. I'm sort of falling hard for an old beaux who has recently reared his head into my life again, and I must say it's going so well! I realized I am so attracted to the simplicity in life, I love going for drives, watching things, cleaning things, loving, snuggling. This new attention that is happening to me is so necessary right now, and I love how he doesn't say "what about me" to any of my elaborate life plans.

And most comfortably I have reached a point in my life where I am fine by myself. I enjoy my own time, and I am good at assimilating a situation for what its worth. Anyway, I should quit it, all of this self examining and be happy.

Because life is happy.

Oh.. adding to the list:

Becoming better at happiness.